Married Cousins: we are very close to them. I was almost homeless at one point, with my child, (thank you psycho ex-fiancee) and these cousins (of my ex-husband, not even my own!) offered to take us in and help me get on my feet, before my own family even thought to offer assistance. They are an amazing couple.
Father of male cousin: an eccentric man who we've met a few times before. He told me a 20-minute story of how he has this sound-zapper-thing he ordered from a tv show that can send a shock wave to any animal within so many feet of you...made for joggers who are chased by dogs maybe, but something he uses for his neighbor's dog, a random cat who used to come by and sleep on his deck, and apparently any animal that is bothering him. He was sporting a new gadget on his waist-a combo led light/black light/TASER(!!!). He also told me a 20-minute story about how best to use the taser without getting caught using it (apparently shocking someones' feet is best).
A Brit: A coworker of male cousin, we've met him a few times before as well. He's an interesting character, tells off-color jokes (as the British tend to do), and drinks a bit much, leading to more off-color jokes that never die. He might be a bit sexist, but I slightly enjoy his company anyway.
Me: I'm wonderful.
The kid: He was in grand form. An angel really.
Best part of the evening: Father and Brit were talking at one end of the table. Father was telling some embarrassing story about the male cousin, quite loudly. Kid and I were joking around about something and facing each other. Female cousin turns to male cousin and says: "we should start screwing" at the exact moment that my son and I turned to them to say something.
One Thanksgiving dinner down...one to go. Tomorrow we drive up north to visit my family. I'm certain that at no point will anyone at the dinner table declare: "We should start screwing."