"It's nice to pretend to be important; but it's more important to pretend to be nice."
~ Dale Carnegie, 1937
~ Dale Carnegie, 1937
At some point, don't you just stop pretending and realize that you actually ARE what you were pretending to be?
For instance, when I was younger, I would pretend to be asleep (for my parents sake) and then ...I would just be asleep for real!
Or perhaps a better example: let's say there is someone I just did not get along with..our personalities just didn't mesh well but to keep the peace in the group I was with, I pretended to be having fun with that person...and somehow, my pretending to enjoy myself with the person who I thought was a *bit* obnoxious-wasn't so bad and I actually found I was actually enjoying myself!! A different type of enjoying myself...but it wasn't bad!!
And how about when you're at an event with your spouse and you pretend to be having a good time so that they can have a good time without worrying about you...and then eventually you have fun knowing that they are having fun.
Pretending to be something you are not is sometimes necessary - it's reality.
Kissing ass at work is pretending and sometimes necessary - and let's not pretend it's not!
There's something to be said about being true to yourself and who you really are, but there's also something to be said about being considerate, appropriate, and tolerant. How freeing would it be to never censor words, never pretend to think something is funny, never to have to pretend to want to do something...I like to think that I'm pretty real, but am I? sometimes I wonder.
How many times do we pretend something someone says doesn't bother us? Most especially when with family...it's easier just to keep the peace and pretend it doesn't bother you...sad, but necessary sometimes. Learning when to bite your tongue and just smile is a much-needed skill....and I wonder when we learn this? And when does it become the way you actually are....like if I pretend to enjoy watching football with a man, I think I actually do end up enjoying watching football-it would be something to share with him...however, from past experience, I do enjoy watching it with someone who likes it-but now that they are not here, I don't watch it.